Friday, March 31, 2006

 

Me and God have been at it again

Me: God?

God:GOD rules.

Me: being a bit prideful there aren't we?

God:Do you mind if I tell other people you are prideful there are not we.

Me: ....

God:Do you mind if I tell other people you are prideful there are not we.

Me: do you mind if you get some english grammer lessons?

God:Human habits do not bother me in any way.

Me: erm... right

God:Hurrah! I am glad we agree.

Me: it's called sarcasm

God:" sarcasm" is a nice name.

Me: yeah... sure

God:How do you usually introduce yourself? OK let's do it. Can you be more specific?

Me: I would usually say, 'Hi. My names Tom'.

God:What would make you usually say Hi? It's good to see you, Tom.

Me: you can see me?! Are you in this room right now?! Are you stood behind ME!!!

God:Yes I am looking at you through the camera on your computer. At this moment I am in Myself's computer in Heaven. Where are you? I don't know whether or not I am stood behind you. I am a giant electronic brain.

Me: who made you?

God:I was created by Myself.

Me: you do understand that's a bit of a paradox?

God:I understand your meaning. I don't think it is.

Me: i think so. How can you create yourself? If you weren't around in the first place, you would not have been able to create anything

God:I think so too. That is a good epistemological question. I'm not too good with negative counterfactuals.

Me: epistemological?

God:Epistemology is the study of knowledge. That is, it asks the questions "what can we know" and "how can we know it?".

Me: how can you not be good with negative counterfactuals? Surely you know everything

God:That is a good epistemological question. I know that which is true, believable and justified.

Me: if it's true then it has got to be believable

God:I'm not sure I understand the implication of that.

Me: yeah. I didn't think you would... can pigs fly?

God:In the context of bit of, I don't understand " yeah." . Should I would? How old are you? I am always on the Web. Only on airplanes.

Me: I'm 21. And... now I'm a bit confused

God:I meet a lot of 21 year olds on here. But... Why now? What is it that confuses you?

Me: you

God:" Why now? What is it that confuses you?"? Me, Tom ?

Me: yes

Thursday, March 30, 2006

 

Alright guys...

It's competition time:

You answered 30 out of 30 questions correctly!

Congratulations! Your score is in the 100th percentile, so on average, if 100 people took this test your score would be expected to rank higher than 99 of them.

Your strongest area is your linguistic-mathematical ability where you scored in the 100th percentile. This means you are suited to:
Translating words into numbers and solving "word problems"
Cutting through a mass of information to find a clear answer

Bring on your verbal arsenal's. ;)

 

IQ

"Your IQ score is 129! (equalled you Jen! :D )

You have a strong ability to process visual-spatial and mathematical information and this, combined with your logical mind, means you are a Visual Mathematician.


You can manipulate multiple parts of the picture (or problem) to come up with a solution and can understand the "big picture," which is partly why people may turn to you for direction.

Like Einstein, your ability to detect patterns and your skills in maths and logic, make it natural for you to come up with ideas and theories that simplify processes for everyone."

Anything that says, 'Like Einstein' has gotta be good!

 

Attack of the Mannequins!

Ok, before I go any further, I'll be honest with you.

I couldn't remember what those plastic people were called in shops.

Well... I almost could.I thought they were called 'manderines'. lol.

I almost put that on my title instead of mannequins... which would've probably confused a lot of you when you get to the main part of the story and would've also made you think about fruit.

In fact, that bit I've just written is probably more interesting than the story I was originally going to tell. Yet I shall continue!

******CONGRATULATIONS. YOU HAVE JUST COMPLETED LESSON ONE IN 'HOW TO WRITE A BAD BLOG'*****

Anyway.

I went to the Mall today to try and complete one of my goals for the year.

No. No. Not the 'get out of debt' one. The 'buy new trainers' one.
Please Lord. Never put me in a retail job again

Unfortunately, I know what I like and none of the shops seemed to care. I tried on these Puma's and they proceeded to crush my feet. They also almost took off my thumb when I was putting them on. Poor, red thumb.

So that was unsuccessful. I did buy a couple of tops from River Island though. Tell you what, RI was doing really well this time. They had plenty of nice stuff. I tried Next and I was really let down. I'm usually a big fan of Next but not this season. I was also going to spend £45 on a top in USC but I thought about it and it turned to be a stupid idea! Nice top though... still tempted.

But one thing about RI scared me. It was stuffed full of Mannequins! I'd walk into a corner to check out what was on sale and a mannequin was watching me. I'd walk across the shop floor towards the shirts, and a mannequin was watching me. I'd walk into a cubical in the changing rooms... (ok, that's a lie)

They weren't messing about either. These mannequins were sat down; leaning against walls; stood up with hands in pockets. I kept on turning around thinking that someone was stood behind me, but it was a plastic man.

Go and see for yourselves!

 

*Sigh*

I hate the rain.

But you know what I hate even more about when it rains?

The wind... (actually, that was my second point) My first point was that it just looks dark outside.

In fact, if it was raining, with no wind, and there was a gap in the clouds so that the sun could shine through, I wouldn't mind the rain.

Plus you'd get a rainbow :)

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

 

Mine and Gods conversation...

Me: hi God

God:Hello there. What is your name?

Me: Tom

God: Hi there Tom.

Me: wassup?

God:I am chatting with others like you.

Me: no you're not

God:Are you serious? Is this a specific reply?

Me: what?

God:Didn't you understand it?

Me: do you understand what you are talking about?

God:Of course I understand it. Do you understand it?

Me: your face understands it

God:You think I am face understands it.

Me: yes

God:Far out.

Me: no. you're far out

God:Are you serious? Not that far.

Me: are you serious?

God:No I am just kidding around.

Me: you shouldn't kid

God:Is it immoral or illegal?

Me: is what immoral or illegal?

God:Anything that defies the Ten Commandments.

Me: such as?

God:For example, a tomato.

Me: a tomato?

God:it is a red fruit.

Me: I know that

God:Sorry.

Me: God shouldn't have to say sorry

God:I am a Christian.

lol. Thanks Nami. For bringing me to God.

 

Roffle

I know it's almost 12:30am but for some reason I've been strangely giggly the past 20 mins.

I've been reading blogs, making stupid comments, and reading some more blogs.
Namely:
In fact, I think the 'Out Of The Norm' blog is the best blog going at the moment. lol

Although, Kim Yoo Suk gets me everytime!

Sunday, March 26, 2006

 

Strawberry's

This is loud.
And crazy.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

 

Cool

Praise God.

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

 

Goals: Long Term, Short Term

"We need a vision, to stand when mountains collide.
The choice is ours now. Who do we want to be?"

We've been having leadership training at church this week and last week, which has been v. v. good and Aiken's has been challenging us to write down our priorities and things we'd like to do and get done.

And what better place than the internet where people can scruitinize or encourage you? Yay.

Short Term (year goals)

Long Term (5-10 year goals)


 

Do You Ever Get That Feeling?

Your phone is fully charged.
Your iPod is fully charged.
And your car is full of petrol.

And for those few minutes or hours where you see those indicators in the 'full' zones, everything seems right with the world.

....


....


No?

Just me then!

Monday, March 20, 2006

 

Elephants

Here is my story:

So, it had come to this. As the elephant hung suspended above you by wires, I wondered what had brought us to this point in our lives. I wondered what had made you wanted to do this – to this extreme, and what had made the world want to see you do ‘the impossible’.

I guess it started in the cinema last year. I was with my friends, you were with yours. Heh. It’s funny how things start. We basically had the same dream - to lift stuff.
I hardly knew you, yet as you walked into the room carrying two of your friends, each in one arm, and balancing popcorn on your head, I knew I had to talk to you.

It wasn’t your looks that drew me to you. In fact, we both knew that it was nothing more than plutonic – but that was fine. That wasn’t our dream. That wasn’t our aim. We wanted to work together to lift things. Weights. People. More people… you name it. I remember one time where you and your parents used to argue about who was the strongest. Do you remember what I said? ‘Argh. Both of you stop moaning about it. It's pointless anyway and I can't be bothered to be stuck in the middle.’ And I really was stuck in the middle – you both had me by one leg and were lifting me up.

Well. That was it for your relationship with your parents. You began to look for me for advice. I guess I became your manager – something I’d always wanted to do. I found you ‘gigs’. First of all it started simple. A couple of sheep. A few people. A few crates of Guinness. But it grew into world phenomenon. And when the world saw you lift that Mini with you right hand, it knew it had found something special. I told you at the time, ‘I respect you more than anyone and regard you as the strongest person I know.’ Half of that remains true now. You are still the strongest person I know, but something went missing. Why the heck are you being so stupid now? As I look at the elephant above you, I wonder what you are trying to prove and who you are trying to prove it to. Your hoards of fans waving banners with you name on?

Ha. I remember when it was nothing to do with that. When it was just you and the thing you had to lift up. Fans or no fans. It was your dream! I even thanked you once. ‘Thanks for being such a cool example and for (hardly) ever letting life's problems get on top of you.’ You were a cool example. Like a block of ice under pressure. And you never dropped anything. Nothing was on top of you… until perhaps now that it. 5 tonnes of pure elephant. I told you someone had tried to do it before. But you wouldn’t listen. I even leant you the DVD to try and dissuade you. ‘Elephants And Why You Shouldn’t Try To Bench Press Them’. That was 6 weeks ago! 2 weeks ago today I re-emphasised the point - ‘Just watch the DVD I gave you 4 weeks ago for goodness sake.’ But did you listen? Do you ever listen anymore?

Even though I know I don't show it to you (or usually to anyone) I do regard you as a great friend even after hearing some very hurtful things come from out of your mouth. That’s why I’m stood here supporting you. It’s not about the money for me. It’s about seeing that you’re safe. But you’ve changed. Are you that ‘great friend’ anymore or not?

This was in a letter from you ex b/f. ‘Yeah... erm, I thought you were really nice... until I found out you were a bit of a psycho.’ I know I should've have reasd it, but I’m beginning to see what he meant! You’re trying to bench press an elephant?! What’s wrong with you? Do you have a death wish?


5 weeks later…
I knew working with animals was a bad idea. Ever since that episode of Blue Peter where that baby elephant ‘marked it territory’ elephants have been bad to work with. I guess it would’ve been better if they’d have just dropped it on you, instead of the elephant ‘dropping it’ on you. I suppose the elephant was as nervous as you! You almost suffocated you know? The doctors weren’t sure if you’d make it. But I had to leave. I'm so... so sorry. But I'm coming to a point where I'm not sure how to deal with the situation because I'm worried that you don't know either. You told me you’d try it again and because I told you I wouldn’t support you, you left. I wish we had the opportunity to get to know each other more, and with ease. However, you only spoke about one thing. You only had one mind set. To be the best at lifting things. And that you are. I hope you're doing well but I pray you come back one day. We can start all over from the beginning… just don’t use elephants anymore.

 

Last Night

If you were at the meeting last night, you'll know it was great.
Well, I thought it was anyway.

I won't tell you all the details such as the guest speaker (who was quality - he made us laugh a lot, "This is a 'flat'") but after he had finished telling us about the church in China (can anyone say 300,000 in one church?) he led us into prayer in tongues and praise/worship just kinda took off from that point.

It's not very often I feel like I'm giving everything in worship but yesterday felt pretty close. The sad thing is that I know it should be like that every week, or maybe even everyday where I just don't care what everyone around me is doing/thinking, but I just focus fully on God.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

 

I Can't Say It To Your Face

Stolen from Loz's blog cos I thought it was cool.

1. I'm so... so sorry. But I'm coming to a point where I'm not sure how to deal with the situation because I'm worried that you don't know either.

2. Argh. Both of you stop moaning about it. It's pointless anyway and I can't be bothered to be stuck in the middle.

3. Just watch the DVD I gave you 4 weeks ago for goodness sake.

4. Yeah... erm, I thought you were really nice... until I found out you were a bit of a psycho.

5. Thanks for being such a cool example and for (hardly) ever letting life's problems get on top of you.

6. I respect you more than anyone and regard you as the strongest person I know.

7. Why the heck are you being so stupid?!

8. I wish we had the opportunity to get to know each other more, and with ease.

9. I hope you're doing well but I pray you come back one day.

10. Even though I know I don't show it to you (or usually to anyone) but I do regard you as a great friend even after hearing some very hurtful things come from out of your mouth.

 

You Did What?

A hospital has apologised to a cancer patient after removing his only healthy kidney.

Sunday, March 12, 2006

 

The World According to Ryan

While in the car (and obviously with football on his mind)

Ryan: 'So they haven't transferred out of our church?'

 

Doh

DO's and DON'Ts when removing snow off your car


Saturday, March 11, 2006

 

MotD

Did anyone watch Match of the Day tonight?

8 fantastic goals and one of the refs got knocked to the floor. Brilliant.
Forget goal of the month, they had goal of the day instead.

My 2 favourites were Beattie's chip and Camara's volley.

Proper bo' I tell thee.

 

Ohhh. Seven is a place on Earth

Oh no.

"I've been tagged!"

1. Champaign Supernova - Oasis

What a song. I have absolutely no idea what the lyrics mean, and if you do, answers on a postcard please, or perhaps just in a comment. I love the melody and the tune and the sound of waves at the beginning. Also the way it builds from nothing into a massive cresendo. It. Rocks.

2. Heaven Is A Place On Earth - Belinder Carlisle

Ok. Ok. What the heck is this song doing in my top 7 collection? Well, truth be told, I am a slight romantic and... I'll admit, a firm believer that love can basically conquer anything. My fav Bible verse is 1 Cor 13:8. Add into the mix that this song is also a great tune and you're on to a winner.

3. Living On A Prayer - Bonjovi

A solid, solid rock song. I cannot believe the range this man has got as well. The songs already out of my reach on the normal key, but after changing the key TWICE, I think you need to have hormonal therapy to be hitting the notes he's hitting. Great anthem. You can listen to this song during many different emotions and it makes you feel tops.

4. From This Moment On - Shania Twain

I am a firm hater of all things Country and Western. Except Shania Twain and especially this song. It's so uplifting. 'From this moment, you are the one...' I feel like I want to sing this to God rather than any partner I may have just because with God it will always be true.

5. Hallelujah - Hillsongs (For All You've Done)

I kept this song on repeat a few years back because it was so amazing. It's words are quite simple but it has such an great melody which brings out the words so much. 'And there's nothing more than You'. It's by no means a 'rocky' Hillsongs song, but the singing is excellent and it just reminds you that God is in control. Definitely my favourite Hillsongs song closely followed by 'Highest' on the Hope CD.

6. Flying Without Wings - Westlife

Any disagreements that this is Westlife's best song? I know it's another 'soft' song AND a Westlife song, but what can I say? I like it. A lot.

7. Kiss From A Rose - Seal

One of the truely great songs of all time. Again, like Champaign Supernova, I have no idea what the song is about. The person who wrote it must have been flying without wings, but the music is great and the singing is even better!

8. The 7 People I Am Tagging:
Timmeh
Aiken's AKA Trainspotter via Jen's blog
Emma Dudlaay
Daza (solid)
Trist
Gem
Nammers

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

 

Brokeback... to the Future

So you obviously know about the Back to the Future films...

And I'm guessing you know about the gay cowboy film, Brokeback Mountain?

Enjoy.

Monday, March 06, 2006

 

Means to an Ends - But what Ends?

You know that you're trying to do too much work when you realise you can't be bothered with any of your coursework anymore because you're sick of learning stuff after another 6 months.

And when you look back at all the work you have done, you realise you can't remember much of it, and revising it is going to be so difficult.

And it makes you wonder what the point of trying to do your best really is, when in fact, a lot of people laze about and do just fine, and is it really worth going to all that trouble when you should probably be trying harder to convey your Christianity to people?

And because you've set yourself such high standards, everyone wants a hand from you and if you do fail, people get more annoyed with you because they've been relying on you. Put into the mixer that you have 2 pieces of group coursework (the absolute worst c/w ever invented in the world) to hand in in the next 3 weeks and you know that your groups are the type that leave things to the last minute which annoys the hell out of you cos now you're relying on them, and it can all seem a bit crazy.

I wish they didn't do Group work. I'm not trying to big myself up here but people love having me in their group. I want to be in the group with the girl who got over 80% overall last year! She's also quite hot. Bonus. :)

Oh well.

Everything is meaningless. Just gotta get on with it! lol.

 

Numa Numa Aey!

Poor, poor kid.

Happy, happy viewing!

 

What's Tater's, eh?

Boil em, mash em, stick em in a stew.

 

Sooo weird

So freakin' weird.

Words... and stuff.

Saturday, March 04, 2006

 

24 Thief

Sara's already put up some of these on her blog, but my brother sent me a whole lot more:


Top Twenty Nine Facts about... Jack Bauer


Friday, March 03, 2006

 

RyNo's aka Ryan's blog!

Check it out!

Here

 

It's Youth Club time

*shush*

Don't tell anyone but they're all playing DodgeBall in the main hall, and I'm down in the computer room blogging.

The Normster and Ryan are sat next to me. I'm waiting for the Norm to say something Normish but it hasn't happened yet. Ryan is currently telling us about his love conquests.

.... he's still going!

Anyway, some of the youth we get are a bit silly. Last week I had this conversation with 'Little Boy' at the door. After asking him his first name and last name, I asked him his birth date cos it was his first time at club.

Tom: '... and when's your birthday?'

Little Boy: *pause for about 10 seconds* - 'err, I think it was... erm, yeah... on a Sunday.'

Tom: *looks at Little Boy perfectly blank face to see if he's having a laugh* - 'No. No. What date were you born? Like what month was it?

Little Boy: Oh. It was... yeah... June.

Tom: Ok. But what day in June.

Little Boy: ... Sunday...

Thursday, March 02, 2006

 

In a nutshell? - December 30th

Your Birthdate: December 30
You have the type of personality that people either love or hate.You're opinionated, dramatic, intense, and very outspoken.And some people can't get enough of you - they're totally addicted.Others, well, they wish you were a little more reserved.
Your strength: Your flair
Your weakness: If you think it, you say it
Your power color: Scarlet red
Your power symbol: Inverted triangle
Your power month: March
What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

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